bwahaha

I'm back so soon! I have to tell you the funny thing that happened at the DMV. I decided to go to the one in City Hall (I always forget it's there until I'm there) which is exactly one door down from the office where I had to get my tax receipt. The DMV is tiny; at capacity it holds about twenty people, and that would be tightly packed.

Anyway, I go in and pull a number. I'm 90, and the ticker says 81. After five minutes nobody has moved. Suddenly an employee opens the door and says to everyone "We are doing training today. If you're here for sticker renewal, go ahead and get in line at the center window. Stick with the order of your numbers."

So I stood up and walked over to the center window. There were two people in front of me. We were in order. All was well. We wait.

In walks a woman, probably early 30s, and it's obvious she's been rushing around. She walks up and basically stands next to me. I figure she probably already has a number if she's being ballsy enough to put herself into a line she knows nothing about since she wasn't there when the sticker renewal announcement was made. I was right, I could see her number in her hand - 84 - and she kept looking at it as if to tell everyone "I am so in line, and probably before you." She gave off an air of exasperation and she sighed a lot.

Finally the first customer at the center window is finished, so the woman in front of me steps up.
"EXCUSE ME!" snaps 84, "I think I'm before you!" She flashes her number and the woman in front of me says "Ok, go ahead." See, none of us told 84 about the announcement she missed. I thought about it several times, and I almost said "are you here for sticker renewal?" to save her some embarassment, but after hearing her sigh mightily every twenty seconds and picking up her Bitch vibe, I thought I'd just play stupid like everyone else and see what happened. Mind you, there were about ten other people in the room waiting to do something other than renew their stickers, and none of them said anything either. It was like a social experiment.

(God, I know how to make a short story long.) (p.s. I am enjoying a Black Cherry Lemonade Slurpee and it is rocking my world.)

So 84 marches up to the window, puts down her armload of paperwork, and says "I need a duplicate title!"

And oh, did I smirk. I really wanted to laugh, and I'm not sure how I managed to not even smile. It was hard. The woman who had made the announcement says to her "THIS LINE IS FOR STICKER RENEWAL. DID YOU NOT HEAR ME."

84 mumbles under her breath and is told to go wait and they will take her when her number is up. Bwahaha.

In conclusion, when it was my turn at the window, 84 was called up to the window next to me and I felt a sick satisfaction when she stumbled through "I need a new title because...I'm...um...well, I'm using my maiden name again, so..." BITCH GOT DIVORCED. Shocking.

I'm sick, I know.

(p.p.s. Can you go get me another Slurpee? I'm fresh out.)